Filed under: Blogger
Faults are ludicrous, unnecessary. Irony, of everything that revolves around me. Lies are inevitable, when they are white. When it’s to protect, rather than to harm.
It’s bearing a burden just knowing.
I still feel that same feeling when bisexual girls go with straight guys and laugh. Or rather, the people close to me. I rather not label though. It’s discrimination. And that itself, is a clash of thoughts. It’s just a result of past experiences. I feel that I should not be blamed by that, just. If I could rid of it, I would.
If I could just drift away, far back into my very own world. Leave all feelings behind. Just happiness, would be enough.
Filed under: Blogger
Suddenly I feel quite nonchalant about whatever I felt yesterday. And I think I know the reason why. I wonder if this feeling will come back.
Ps. If anyone messages me on my cell and I don’t reply, the reason is that for some stupid reason, the stupid touchscreen won’t work when I try to press ‘contacts’ or ’send’. Bloody fuck.
Okay, I’ve got a stubborn phone. It suddenly worked.
Filed under: Blogger
the rose was the prince’s friend made on his own planet.
and that made the prince yearn for the rose.
when he left. that’s because they’ve established a friendship.
and that because they’ve established a friendship,
that particular rose (despite having found so many other roses on earth),
is the only rose that is special. because they’ve established friendship
through effort put in by watering that plant everyday.
Extracted from the private blog.
Maybe one day I’ll find the courage to share what really goes on inside me.
Filed under: Rants
You know, honestly.. I prefer it when people just say it in my face. So at least I know how they feel and all. Not go through so many people and make it all troublesome. I will understand. And even if I don’t, just explain and I WILL understand. Come on. Why make life so difficult?
GEEZ.
Dilemma. You know it’s hard? No you don’t, and you’re just making it even more difficult. Because you don’t trust me. So fine.
I’m cool.
Filed under: Rants
I am at work, and half an hour ago two ladies approached me to talk to about God. And they tried to persuade me to be christian. Okay, first of all, I have tried being christian before. I’ve tried, I’ve gone to church before. Like, several attempts. But I do not believe in following a certain God and his/her beliefs. I believe in myself and I believe there is a higher power that’s controlling the force of nature.
I also believe in the Law of Attraction. If you are always the pessimist, then you attract bad things all the time. Of course, if you do not work towards your goals, then it will never come true. It’s very common sensical.
And so I explained to them why I do not believe in God and will not ‘accept God’s love’ since I was quite free. And stood by my beliefs. It’s not easy to change, after so long. I believe there are hard times and there are good times. So if you get past the hard times, the good times feel better than ever. That’s how you appreciate things.
If there is love, I’d rather a love from an existing physical being. Not one that I cannot see, I cannot touch and I cannot hear because I will not feel loved that way. That’s my thought on being loved.
Filed under: Blogger
‘Love is a losing game’
For you I was a flame
Love is a losing game
Five story fire as you came
Love is a losing game
One I wish I never played
Oh what a mess we made
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game
Played out by the band
Love is a losing hand
More than I could stand
Love is a losing hand
Self professed… profound
Till the chips were down
…know you’re a gambling man
Love is a losing hand
Though I’m rather blind
Love is a fate resigned
Memories mar my mind
Love is a fate resigned
Over futile odds
And laughed at by the gods
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game
Filed under: Blogger
Sometimes it’s undeniable.
Sometimes it’s non-existent.
Sometimes it’s confusing.
Other times I just try not to give a shit about it.
I know as long as your presence is felt, I’m good. That simple.
It’s true that whenever you’re too happy, the going down period just sucks. Wish that the goodness can just continue on forever. Even if we have to stretch it to it’s limits.
It goes two ways to make things work. I wonder if I’ll ever find someone like you again.
If hoping could do things any good, I would continue hoping.
Filed under: Blogger
I feel like haven’t seen everyone in fucking ages. Ever since the Sunday, I’ve been at home. Haven’t stepped out of the house once. Tomorrow I’ll finally see everyone. Even though, it’s just been like, 4 days. Tomorrow I’d have to work opening, which is I’m not sure from what time till what. Z.
I can’t wait for tomorrow!
Filed under: Blogger
i try to get the message across but apparently it isn’t getting anywhere. the frequency is all different and we both have different viewpoints. i’m wishing that everything will last as long as it can possibly last. and you’re just the realist, all the time. yes i know. but i prefer to hope sometimes. i prefer to dream and give it the best shot i have without being the pessimist i know i can be. the stupidly sensitive person i can be.
it is hard not to care, because i am a protective person towards people i feel dear to. if anything ever happens to any of my close friends you bet i’ll be there for a shoulder or whatever.
‘the little prince’ was a book i gave to you because i thought you could understand. after that, when i knew you didn’t get it. it would mean we couldn’t be the closest. ‘the little prince’ learnt that bonds are created when people spend time together. even without saying anything. it’s just a presence that you get used to. and after a long while, of just spending time together. even without having to say it, you will miss that person’s presence.
that’s just the person i am.
everyone has their different opinions on friendships, and who is close in what way and what. and how each will react to the other.
i know everybody drifts apart after a while, but in the end it’s whether each party puts in effort to maintain the friendship after all.
the last week has given me too much i could probably handle, but i will miss it. and the people involved. my phobia is people i’m close to leaving me. that’s it.
p.s Qtopia was fucking boring for me. Seriously. Even though the pictures look all fun.
